Pivo @Pivo@qoto.org

If you'll look at this slide, you can see the Death Star's weaknesses here–
*Stormtrooper misses with laser pointer*
*Misses again*
Actually, no weaknesses. Let's move on.

[closes book, slowly removes glasses, and thoughtfully cleans them with a small cloth] I honestly don't think Waldo is in there

I like to go to zen gardens and shout at things.

How would I know what's offensive I'm a boomer.

According to my fitness app, I watched 15 miles of Netflix this week.

Meet the punk rocker of the tit family, the crested tit.

In the UK, these charming but feisty characters are only found in the Scottish Highlands.

This individual made my day when it posed in a near perfect manner, looking right down my lens.

This was from a day out, almost a decade ago, with my good friend Neil McIntyre.

#CrestedTit #ScottishHighlands #BirdPhotography #Highlands #Scotland #NatureLover #Photography #PunkRocker #Wildlife #WildlifePhotography #Birding

Firstly, I'd just like to say thank you to all the people who have liked, boosted and commented on my images, and to all the new followers I have. It's rather humbling. 😊

Today's shot comes from a magical day in the Scottish #Highlands, a few years ago, when I was photographing red squirrels.

These charming characters are incredibly agile and can jump great distances between trees.

Here I managed to capture one as it appears to be flying down my lens.

#redsquirrel #scotland #wildlife #fun

My friend got mad because I told him that his motherboard was hot.

I think Mambo #5 is probably the best song about numbered mambos.

It’s like I always say: *40 seconds of awkward silence*

It sucks when the cashier at Walmart tells you that you're $43,956,000,000 short of paying for everything and you have to put something back.

As it turns out, listening to the album Blood on the Tracks was not quite the pick-me-up I thought it would be

[on 1st date]
Me: Have you ever flown to Paris on a private jet before?
Her: No, I'd love to
Me: Same
Me: *shows photo of cat* this is Tim

Me: I thought I was going to end up with a hickie at least?

Necromancer: What

Which is worse for the recipient, a glitter bomb or a bag of dicks? I am trying to get this birthday present just right

I can do all the beans recipes:

- Beans on toast
- Beans beneath toast
- Toast-adjacent beans
- Toast island amid a sea of beans
- Beans island amid a sea of toast
- Beans [are you absolutely certain you don’t want some toast with those?]

Her: I don't even know what the cloning machine does

Me: well that makes two of us

Recycling tweets on Mastodon is just good for the environment, right?

them: what’s your favorite fruit?

me: by the foot

them: no what kind

me: pink