Furry in an Omegaverse Isekai @tormeh@qoto.org

“You kiss your mother with that mouth?”
“Nope. I kiss YOUR mother with this mouth!”

Currently thinking about how Tolkien spent decades developing the world’s most epic story setting and then the most profoundly primordial and powerful god is Thomas from the pub

“I wish people would start seeing me as something besides just a thirst trap.” – Desert Mirage

Tested positive for negativity.

Abject #CrossBorderRail ticket fail for tomorrow 🤦‍♂️

@Johanonthetrain (who’s travelling with me tomorrow) and I happily book the tickets for the 09:39 TER train Saarbrücken-Strasbourg tomorrow in SNCF Connect… and AFTER booking get this - collect the ticket from a ticket machine

And so we go to Saarbrücken station (that’s near the hotel) and there’s NO SNCF TICKET MACHINE 🤦‍♂️

We’ll try our luck tomorrow explaining this to the train manager!

*flatlining EKG sounds*

NURSE: You're a disgrace to your profession.

ME: Actually, I'm a damn good accountant. Surgery is just a hobby.

me: [about to cut the crime scene tape across the front door of our new house with a pair of GIANT novelty scissors] ok now hear me out, this place was a real barg..

wife: no

I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. I’m saving it for my best enemy

what doesn't kill you makes you fatter

The perfect confirmation dialog does not exist…

I never compare myself with others. What do you do?

🕺

Me: never assume

Wife: because it makes an ass of u and me?

Me: what did i just say diane

DOCTOR: This condition shouldn’t stop you from living a normal life
ME: So what is stopping me then

meet me at the combination Uber/AirBnB in ten minutes if u want an ass kicking

Finally met my spirit animal in the form of an old man who was driving his mobility scooter into oncoming traffic.

Assert dominance by making clear what becomes of your enemies.

For someone who thinks public posting is mostly a bad idea, I certainly have done a lot of public posting over the last 15 years. (Bad ideas are kind of my thing.)