Masking and compartmentalizing is just a band aid. Not a quality of life.
Betrayal trauma is the expectation to play along with it.
Can I compartmentalize? Can I mask? I'm an expert.
But I have a harder time forgetting or unknowing betrayal.
Ppl ask me how I have such a good memory.
But having to learn how to internalize and reconcile with constant sources of external harm impacts how one engages memory.
They say the body stores memory. This is true. Even when you "cope" well. Even when u know how to compartmentalize and carry on. But that pain goes somewhere.
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@XoGloomnrainbows
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
Bessel van der Kolk M.D.
