mh-, gift giving
bf said he'll buy me a new guitar tomorrow for my birthday. initially i was thrilled but now all i can feel is "why am i getting a treat without sitting? am i a bad boy?"
mh-, gift giving
"if i didn't do something painful and difficult to earn a reward, i don't deserve it, and therefore i stole my reward"
mh-, gift giving
living an entire additional year was difficult and painful, but it's not an actionable item i had to do. like rewarding me for accidentally being run over by a bus
mh-
AND SO the Point of this is that i still want to die
mh-
@wolfgang You gotta remember something, though. It's that you're fantastic and that 'voice' in your head is a lying shitbag who only wants to drag you down.
Play the heck out of that guitar and know that you are loved!
mh-
@wolfgang Not you. You're not that.
That depression voice in your head, though. That part of you that makes you feel that way is not telling you the truth about who you are.
mh-
@Surasanji lying shitbag does sound like me i guess