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long after all memory of the united states has faded into the fog of history, gamers will still say "thanks obama" whenever they get owned by RNG

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other countries:
hmmmm what should we put on our bank notes. how about this famous dude

Norway:
cod

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"I'm [ethnicity]. So as you can imagine, food is especially important to us." -literally everyone

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Ok, this is kinda cool: futurity.org/body-temperature-

The old average human body temperature of 98.6 (set in 1851) is likely no longer correct, as we're running cooler than we used to. Maybe due to better public health. And they corrected for more accurate thermometers!

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Life Hack: kill your gods then fall into despair because you must now construct something to replace them

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femeninity, its femininity, but for the fellas

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Illegal to talk about Star Wars in 2020, it’s time for a break

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Going to buy the cheapest 3D printer there is and print the most expensive 3D printer there is.

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a bidet is just a toilet that pisses back

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🎵Had to have high, high hopes for a living
Shooting for the stars when I couldn't make a killing
Didn't have a dime but I always had a vision
Always had high, high hopes🎵

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i do my taxes every year but rather than paying them, i put them in escrow which the government will be able to access once it becomes full communist

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weird how you never hear about community chest the rapper

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son, my father wore this Afghan War vet hat before me, and you'll wear it after me. since we live in the freest country on earth, you'll be able to pass it onto your sons when time comes for them to enlist in the War in Afghanistan

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Talking to dead carwash attendants with my squeegee board

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Have we talked about Businessweek’s Alexa Ear Fleshlight cover, yet?

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