the new ultraphone 7 is sleek, sexy, and slender. it's got a gorgeous glass finish that would make anyone fall in love at first sight. an adorable USB-C port sits at the bottom of the device. the top right houses an incredibly fuckable headphone jack
why did we start referring to technology as "sexy"? sexy is a word that means something has sex appeal. i mean, if you want to fuck a macbook, that's great, but keep it out of the review
yeah, this laptop runs well, and it's got a really solid build, but... is it sexy? i wouldn't buy it if it wasn't sexy
they were so ashamed of this one that they had to write it in small font
broke: the laptop has a solid construction and eye-catching build
woke: this is one sexy laptop that we can't just tear our eyes away from
bespoke: i am writing this from the hospital as i have put my penis into the optical drive
close your eyes. imagine the sexist windows laptop you can. i'm talking the hottest, most fuckable piece of windows-compatible machinery on the planet. open your eyes. you're looking at the HP Spectre 13, aren't you?
