I am going to give a huge disclaimer at the beginning of this post. I have heard more casual Xenophobia from white USian democrats than I am about to mention from Germans. If you mistake this post for "Oh it's so bad in Germany" then you missed the point of this post. Pot meet kettle. If that's how you feel as an American Citizen in this post, you are not the world police and you are no angel. This post is about privilege, nationalism and xenophobia. Not singling out Germany.

I was having a conversation with a Croatian coworker about her Serbian boyfriend. If you know nothing about Croatia/Serbia then think Romeo and Juliet because it's an unlikely pairing that would be culturally and familialy frowned upon. He recently had to go back to Serbia because his short stay visa expired.

She said "It isn't so easy for Serbians as it is for Americans [ To get a work-stay visa ]. Western Europe hates us."

I agreed with her because she was right. I am treated to extreme privilege even as America loses face on the world stage. People generally look at my blue eyes, blonde hair and good german and think "This bitch is German". My coworker is generally assumed to be Italian because she's overweight and brown haired and speaks slightly worse German than me. Lookism paired with Fatphobia means most people think she's Italian.

Because she's too respectable and clean to be "Eastern European".

What I generally receive as Xenophobia is "Assumed Idiocy" or people just calling me an "American Idiot". For people from eastern europe it's much worse. They are considered filthy thieves. The EU is currently pressuring Serbia and ex-Yugoslavia so the vast majority of deportations in Germany are Serbian. Do I think it's fair? No.

But Germans are also prone to look at me in awe and wonder. I am mostly treated with respect everywhere I go. I am the Immigrant and the American fantasy. A firm believer in democracy, equality and egalitarianism that is willing to integrate and respect cultures. It is the positive view of what people see America for and I am everything their Elvis and JFK flavored, rose-tinted glasses see in my country. Because of it I am granted huge privilege. Not so much as German but more so than an Eastern European or someone from say Pakistan or Palestine.

It's something of a perspective change for me upon moving to Germany. White Supremecy is suprising and absolutely appalling. There's even a scale for how white of a white person you are and I am usually scored right below your average german, even by Auslanderbehörde. My immigration agent loves me because I obey and integrate. I am not an Amerikaren and I work for a very famous restaurant. I am what Germany needs. A skilled worker that is an embodiment of everything that Germany values and requires.

I'm also white as milk.

That isn't to say that my girlishfriend wasn't mistreated today by pensioners that assumed she wasn't German because she was speaking English and I was speaking German. An act that made my blood boil but more to say that I get a great deal more leeway than people that are brown or black and because I am educated, skinny and fall under the label of "Western European Attractive" that I am awarded a place of honor I did nothing to deserve and I hate it.

I hate that I have been hired because one of my male bosses thought that I looked fuckable. That the Ausländerpolizei looked at me in awe and mysticism then turned around and treated my Serbian/Croatian coworker like she was a child. I hate every second of it but it's not something I can escape.

I'll close with this. We had some guy come to our house because they are installing Glass Fiber in our building. He was brown and so he thought we'd assume he wasn't German. My Girlishfriend said "no and you're not the only immigrant here. My girlfriend here is American." to which he replied "Oh du sprichst so gutes Deutsch" ( En: Oh you speak such good German ). He was from Jordan but still. It's not an assumption we'd make but I was still "assumed German".

Skin color isn't nationality and I'd really wish the world could get the f over this shit but we can't. So it's accept it or deny it but there is no real denying it. So I accept my privilege and try to use it to help others. It's the only answer in this situation that really helps anyone. I just wish more people could accept it and move on than gaslight others and scream and hope the problem goes away.

#nationalism #worldpol #eupol #immigration #immigrantlife