About 95% of my direct message work slack conversations go like this.

Person: Hello <misspelled first name and sometimes just misspelled last name despite both being right there>

Person: Regarding <sequence of letters and numbers because I must memorize every item in Service Now>

Me: <waits for a while because I’m working on something in my backlog instead of fixing their problems>

Me: ok….

Person: <radio silence for a long duration, minutes, hours, days…>

Person: <question with obvious answer or something that can be addressed with their supposed expertise that landed them their job>

Me: <explaining how computers work and that CPU is not memory and memory is not disk and disk is not memory or CPU and that compute resources actually do cost money>

Me: <googles “remote cabins”>