@ohmu @moira apologies if this is perceived out of place.
I think what is missing, but needed here, is a reflection of which of the problems are Mastodon-related, and which are ActivityPub-related. In case the first, the problem is probably technical and rather solvable. In the latter, it's much more complicated, as for example reply-gating illustrates (see https://github.com/mastodon/mastodon/issues/8565#issuecomment-1444583776).
Mekka is a very important voice here, because he has both the expertise and the resources to not only better identify problems, but also to shape solutions.