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I saw this online somewhere and I just had to recreate it. This is my coding happy place.

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You have been visited by margaret hamilton. Fast code and moon landings will come to you but only if you boost this toot

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I just sneezed and farted at the same time and I think my body took a screen shot.

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There's no law that says that if you follow politics, it has to be your country's politics. I, for one, choose the one which has the funniest satirists.

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@fox I read this as “I have a 6-year-old” and it was just as relevant

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My daughters and I are feeding cows 10,000 pounds of macadamia nuts each and totally don't need to be taxed at 95+ percent of our income.

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This is probably the best thing I ever posted on Twitter. The memory is pretty dear to me; I'm sharing it here so it still exists somewhere if that place collapses.

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1000 richest people are approched. "The end of the world is here. Time to go to your doomsday bunker", they are told. The billionaires nodded. They knew this was coming. They were prepared.

So they gathered their loved ones and locked themselves in luxury bunkers. No contact to outside world.

10 years later they emerge. The world has healed. The air is breathable, people are happy. "What was the catastrophy?" they ask the first person they meet.

She screams: "THEY GOT OUT!!!"

#microfiction

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People only believe you’re a real scientist if you know the “c” is silent

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Rep. Foxx explained the investigation into plagiarism accusations by Harvard's black woman president Claudine Gay was prompted by "concern is that standards are not being applied consistently, resulting in different rules for different members of the academic community."

Stanford's former president Marc Tessier-Lavigne‚ the white male billionaire who resigned after accusations of biomedical fraud but was not investigated by congress, was unavailable for comment.

thehill.com/homenews/education

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A plateau is the highest form of flattery.

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“The signal is repeating! We’ve got the whole thing.”

“How many bits?”

“Almost 500k. 454,957 bits”

“I got a hunch, factorize that number”

“Bingo, seven fifty seven times six oh one. Think it could be a rectangular bitmap?”.

“It’s what we used to do back before those assholes let Arecibo fall down. Try bm2png.pl in my bin dir.”

“That worked. Holy shit I know that image. It’s the Pioneer plaque. That diagram from Pioneer 11 of human figures, and a map to Earth.”

“What, thats impossible, it’s only been, what, 70 odd years. That probe would still be in our own Kuiper Belt.”

“Outside it, actually, it’d be about one sixty AU out. They lost contact in the mid 90s. Still basically in our backyard but.”

“It’s too soon! If someone’s found it now, that would mean. Shit. They’re. Already. Here. Inside the Solar system.”

“And all they’ve got to say, is ‘Hi, we liked ur meme’.?”

“Maybe not, can you bring up an image of the original plaque? Are the images identical?”

“I’ll do a layer subtraction. Hey, there /is/ a difference. In the map of the planets. They’ve omitted Pluto from their copy.”

“Fucking hell. Little green reply guys.”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction

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Inside a 250 year old French Violin. Photographed with a Medical Laparoscope adapted to a Lumix G9ii Camera. A 1770 violin by Augustin Chappuy. #music #art #photography

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My old teacher used to tell me that I'd never be any good at poetry due to my dyslexia.

Well I've recently made three jugs and a vase, so up yours Mr Jones.

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