(This thread should nominally be published by my social alt and boosted by my main; I'm doing it the other way around so that I don't have to fragment it as much.)
social alt thread, topic introduction
I like to think that I'm hard to irrevocably fuck up with.
Where this comes from is seeing creatures (some, about their connections with me; others, not) be anxious about losing creatures they cared for because of mistakes they hypothetically might make.
And what this means is that I try to make it so that you can make little mistakes—and even big ones—without suddenly losing me. Short of turning around and being outright abusive—or outright putting me or mine in danger—while I'm telling you clearly to stop (which /has/ happened before; I'd have about twenty cents); short of that, I won't just drop you.
social alt thread, on terminating relationships and communication relating to that
Up until now, I've applied this to a very broad scope—not only partners and friends, but also acquaintances, creatures I have parasocial links to, and “I've seen them a lot and I like their posts”. Because, yknow, if that creature I thought was cool blocked me and later regretted it, but that act had been irreversible, wouldn't that just be /so/ tragic?
That's made some things awkward, because Calckey doesn't allow me to mute an account but leave notifications open. So I've been kind of going back and forth between doing nothing and trying to remember to not interact with these people's posts, and muting them so that I can't accidentally do that. And I've been anxious about being accused of block evasion or something since I migrated to my new accounts, which aren't blocked. >.<;
So I'm not going to do this particular thing anymore. If someone decides to terminate a relationship[very broad] without verbally communicating new boundaries, then a consequence of that decision is that it will be difficult-to-impossible to reverse. And that's on them.
social alt thread, on terminating relationships and communication relating to that
With the understanding that silent blocks are fine and good; creatures who have blocked me, or who appear to have blocked me, I will now mute if I start seeing them again and they haven't reached out to explain or communicate boundaries.
If you drop me hard, then I will let go, hard.
social alt thread, on terminating relationships and communication relating to that
You might wish to remember about false positives caused by admins of {yours,theirs} instance deciding to block {theirs,yours} instance.
social alt thread, on terminating relationships and communication relating to that
@robryk@qoto.org that's where /reach out to explain/ comes in. one or both of us should realize that it's an instance issue and reestablish contact another way. besides, I think it's unlikely that defederation would happen and interact with this.