The idiom "an axe to grind with you" has never made sense to me; grinding an axe makes it sharp, if you want to fight you better have already sharpened your axe. It should be "ground an axe for you" or "an axe to dull" instead.
Gift of thought to me from you here, thank you. Next I googled, and now I reply
=>
Yes
The Grinding of the Ax is done before the meeting, traditionally, in exact accord with your precise logic
> Etymology 2
> A reference to someone sharpening an axe with the intent to kill someone.
> https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/ax_to_grind
It's a sad violent word picture, like so much of computer engineering
The sad violent picture for the alternative of struggling together after we begin meeting is the first cross-reference at Wiktionary, it is
> have a bone to pick
As if scavengers eating meat from corpses
@pelavarre @schizanon huh, i took it to be a cultural reference developed out of an allusion to the biblical proverb “as iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another”. jesus’s instructions were to address conflict resolution one-on-one first. so this would not be violent imagery, if that’s the reference
