a while back, I started asking people "what do you like to do?" or "what excites you?" or "what kind of stuff are you interested in" instead of the tired old "what do you do for work?" and the way they light up is pure gold.
on the flip side, when someone opens with "so what do you do?" I intentionally talk about my hobbies and interests instead of work. they always get startled at first but the conversation inevitably turns warmer and deeper.
Results may vary. I've tried this a few times, but I guess people don't understand what I'm asking or maybe they think I'm getting too personal. Because most times they ask for clarification about what I'm asking and then it's just totally weird.
It seems like a lovely way to start a conversation, but I can't say it's worked for me. Maybe I'm just too awkward to ask something non standard.
@MCDuncanLab yeah, it hasn't always worked for me either, but i try to work around it depending on the situation and vibe. sometimes i make the questions a bit more specific: what kind of music do you listen to? do you like to read?
their response usually gives me an opening to talk to them further about that interest. and sometimes i ask about their interests after the usual work-related small talk.
@wordswithnima @MCDuncanLab I say that it is not your ... fault, for lack of a better word ... that many people do nothing outside of work and FOMO stuff. Of course, they'd get uncomfortable!
