Hot take: using baby talk when talking to children is a form of child abuse.

@freemo you should ask to experts, not to us.

IMHO, you had to create a connection, utilizing multiple channels of communication. It is a mix of body and spoken language. You become partially a Charlie Chaplin. You are not only speaking, but also acting and partially singing. It's also a turn-based game: you say something, and you wait for a reaction. Usually, you imitate a little the answer of the child, but in more adult way, and the child step by step, try to imitate the adult way. It is usually a step by step imitation process.

@mzan I think you are perfectly fine if you dont use baby talk but still engage in the body language portion.

You can also use incremental steps increasing the complexity of the language without using the condescending tone and made-up words of baby talk.

@freemo without a video as example, it is difficult to judge when the "baby talk" is a fair communication, or when it is a form of "aggression" towards the poor baby. Like my grandmother pretending always "give me a kiss, give me a kiss". πŸ™‚

@mzan I think there is a bit of a divide here.. like you can treat a child in appropriately without it being baby talk, and there is a lot of overlap. But im talking about baby talk which often even translates to young children in a slightly different way, its always very condescending.

An example of it when used on toddlers and young teens is when they do something worthy of praise and the adults go "yayyyyy and clap" but do it in a tone that is unique to addressing children and very different to, say applause at a sports arena. That is, it always has a condescending tone to it.

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@freemo it is a never ending discussion, if done on Mastodon. You should search in bibliography what experts are saying. Or you can follow the scientific approach: take two children and two adults, acting in two completely different ways, and observe the way the children react.

I agree that an extreme condescending interaction is not optimal, but I bet that children are rather good in perceiving fake emotions. If you enjoy the play and interaction, then the child will smile and he will start playing. Probably the ultimate judge is the child, not me or you πŸ™‚

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@mzan I dont need "experts" to see the harm.. it seems quite obvious to me where all the children I see raised being treated that way are extreemely stunted. The ones treated as equals tend to be extremely successful adults. Its like saying i should look to experts to understand if the sun will rise tomorrow. Some things are so obvious I dont need an expert to tell me.

@freemo according this page edition.cnn.com/2020/02/03/hea

I figure out that I speak to child in parentese and not in proper baby-talk. At maximum I can intersperse parentese with some "ahhh", "ohhh", "ehhh", but these are exclamations, not baby-talk.

It seems that parentese is better for children. Obviously with slow cadence, and simplified grammar.

@mzan It isnt just the choice of words but the tone is extremely important to my point too.

With babytalk the tone is very unnatural, usually a high-pitched falsetto for some reason. This aspect becomes particularly harmful as the child is able to communicate because of its condescending and dismissive nature.

A lot of it is about how you say it not just what you say.

Frrrr.... fru fruuu @freemo, I'm tootalking to you πŸ™‚

@mzan awww what a littl schmibble of a smooble you are, yes you are you little cutie!

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