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I long for the day where mothers spend more time with their baby girls (and boys) reading books and teaching them about the stars than they do taking pictures of their kids in cute outfits...

Sadly things seem to be going in the opposite direction.

@freemo parents must teach their kids to read stories and spend time with family. Posting pictures ain't gonna help developing human emotions.

@_lunawinters
Part of the problem, a big one, is the parent's themselves being frayed and distracted by incessant media and notifications, imo.

It is a real concern indeed. WE have too much information, and struggle to cope. A lot of it is worthless, some might say planted for distracting people from more serious issues.

Sometimes it seems that things would improve if we lost some of the current deluge, massive communications overload.

Great article on this from The Atlantic!!

theatlantic.com/magazine/archi
@freemo

@freemo A lot of times parents themselves aren't ready to have kids. Or at least, not ready for or never understood the fact that when you raise a kid, life isn't about you anymore.

But alas most parents handle things with the intent of feeling good about themselves rather than actually growing their kids.

@Rovine True, but i think thats just another reflection of irresponsibility. Most people who have kids do it for selfish reasons. In fact id argue having a kid is probably the most selfish thing anyone could do in general witht he caveat that **Raising** a child (well) is the one of the least selfish things a person can do.

So with that said, they should have probably been responsible and used protection or got an abortion if they werent ready to have a kid yet.

Either way i do **not** place all the blame on the parents either. The system, and the environment, lends itself to these patterns as well. The issue goes beyond any one actor. ITs just the parent is probably the easiest place to break the cycle.

@freemo It's precisely why I'm not having kids. I know I'm not ready. Doesn't stop mum wanting grandchildren though 😑

@freemo I just spent the whole day with my mum. We went for shopping and spent all our money on books and plants :'
Such a weird coincidence that you posted this :annoyingdog:

@Karthikdeva Your mom sounds like a class act <3 give her an extra hug for me for raising you well :)

@freemo Well she is my iron woman :100a: and yes, extra hug for her today :)

@Karthikdeva can i be your sister? So that i can enjoy those moments?

@freemo

@_lunawinters @freemo YES!
I don't have any siblings and id be happy to have a sister :blobaww:

@Karthikdeva

Can i be that weird quirky cousin everyone thinks is adopted? I would like to keep my current mother but wouldnt mind an indian relative or two so I can show up unannounced and eat all their food :)

@_lunawinters

@freemo @_lunawinters Welcome to the fam cousin (whom i secretly think is weird & quirky but an amazing guy, and possibly adopted, but shh.. You didn't hear that from me)

@Karthikdeva

::looks up as he eats all your indian food::

Works for me cuz :)

@_lunawinters

@Karthikdeva @freemo i would love to have a sibling who is actually worth having 🖐️😢

@_lunawinters
LOL... Where in the kids timeline are you? First Born? Last Born, or one of the middle ones?

It changes things a lot.

@Karthikdeva @freemo

@design_RG last born. I have an older brother but he's a clown.
In my whole family(including cousins) , i am actually the oldest sister of all , so i need to be an example for them.

@Karthikdeva @freemo

@Karthikdeva
Yes indeed. Being first born, I had to be the exmple for the younger ones, there were 4 of us kids.

But recently I read about the order of birth therory, and really wish I had an older sister to look up to. 😺

Aaditi is much younger than me, but I found a friend on my last trip that, on looking back on our hiking, travel together, I think of as the older sister I never had.
@_lunawinters @freemo

@freemo @design_RG @_lunawinters As an only child i can certify this certification.
But hey! Ain't nobody gonna take my food

@Karthikdeva @freemo @_lunawinters
That is actual academic Psych professor reasearch ,and I read with interest and agreed with.

Discovered the Older Sister that was missing in my life and would have been a boom for my future relationships with other ladies.

A good early sis mothering and exposure to the feminine way of thinking makes dealing with ladies later a lot smoother; you are not learning on the spot, so to speak.

@design_RG me and my brother don't have a good relationship. No wonder he isn't good with girls😂

@Karthikdeva @freemo

@_lunawinters

For most boys and grown up men, that is probably the case.

And the girls and ladies have to deal with some rough treatment too, of course. Only Children probably suffer most, I think.

@Karthikdeva @freemo

@design_RG

I am an only child and my mother suffers from some severe anxiety that often manifests in ways that she would handle things rather emotionally and not always in the best of ways (though there was no shortage of love from her).

As such I always had to look to myself to figure out what was right or wrong as I was the only one who I felt could be "rational" and fair in judging situations.

In many ways I had to be the adult, at least emotionally.

@_lunawinters @Karthikdeva

@freemo @_lunawinters @Karthikdeva

The theory mentions that an Older child has to do what you did, and be the role model for the younger ones too, sicne the only other available model is an Adult.

First Borns are forced to look up to the adults as the only available role models, and theory posits that leads to an earlier maturity and more independant thoughts.

@design_RG

I'm an only child, not first born.. but i guess the idea carries over...

I guess you can argue im the first, first in a group of one...

@_lunawinters @Karthikdeva

@freemo Once a colleague of mine asked if she can borrow the book I'm reading as she thought one of her daughters had recently discovered reading and it would help a lot if she sees her mother reading too. I happily gave her the book even before finishing it. After few days she told me that every night her daughter grabs a book and start to read on seeing her mother read. My happiness knew no bounds :)

@freemo
This, or rather people just willing to lead there 'nice and chill' family life without worrying about a changing world, is indeed worth worrying about! ;-)

You might be interested in Nolen Gertz's new book on Nihilism: bol.com/nl/p/nihilism/92000001 .
There is also a great recent podcast where he is interviewed about the subject: open.spotify.com/episode/6dcus

@Erik While i see some value in nihlistic philosophy (particularly specific forms of it I wont get into) I would not say im generally someone into nihlism, especially the modern day brand of it. With that said perhaps this particular book is the sort I might enjoy, so not going to judge it specifically.

If i get the chance i will take a peek at the book and see if it calls to me.

@freemo Then I really recommend you to listen the podcast first, there he explains what he thinks is wrong with modern day nihilism :-) I haven't read the book yet, only listened to the podcast. But he is a teacher at my university and I know him as a great philospher / ethicist / teacher!

@Erik I will given him a chance on your endorsement then.

Bear in mind though that i am very overloaded with getting my startup off the ground right now. So may not have time to pursue that for a bit.

@freemo Ah cool! What are you working on (/ starting up on)? :)

@Erik Sadly i have to keep it secret up to the release for profit reasons, especially because it will be mostly open source and easily stolen.

I will say keep an eye on the cleverthis.com domain as that is where i will host it when im ready to publish the software.

It will be software related to distributed computing in heterogeneous networks.

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