🇳🇱
Shout out to that time a long-time friend of a friend who always had a crush on me was devastated when I called her out (and ultimately cut her off) for hitting her child.
No one is going to beat their child in public and expect to not get an ear full out of me. I dont care who you are.
@freemo Shout-out for doing the right thing, facing punishment and staying true to yourself.
And in private doesn't make it less evil!
Some people have wondered why (for instance) Sweden had so few (until recently) murders, compared to (for instance) USA. I think part of it is that "disciplining children" (by physical or mental violence) has been denounced for many generations, and illegal since (I think) the 1960s.
Good communities start by stopping violence against children.
For sure, i would call it out in private too.. In this situation she had done it in public and a bunch of people int he resteraunt gave her shit.. she came to me to complain how she was "disiplining" her kid in public and how she got in trouble.... this was when i learned she hit her kid and i lost it. I didnt see the actual abuse, she was coming to me to tell me how she was "unfairly" criticized for hitting her kid. My response was "good, they should have criticized you, your lucky thats all they did, stop beating your child"
@freemo @niclas @AmpBenzScientist
would you say she is "beating" her child less for having lost your friendship?
I cant say for sure, but one would hope.
Regardless of if she did or not, I wouldnt have any desire to be friends with someone who abuses little children.
I didnt shun them They shunned me for calling them out on it and siding with those judging her.
I just have no regrets over the shunning.
And nto be fair while i was harsh and direct, I was also kind about it... I think basically she was furious she just beat her kids in public at a resteraunt and how several people called her out in public, she felt awful.
I responded with something fairly straight forward but respectful like 'Yea, I would have called out someone doing that too. Hitting your child is never acceptable and I am glad people didnt just accept a child being abused and say nothing" and I know I said "I would have done the same if I saw a small child being hit in public, for any reason"
@freemo @WoodSharpening @niclas Normally that would get someone kicked out of a church. Child abuse is a proud tradition in religions.
@freemo
i pretty much feel like we live in a social environment that forces, or at least coerces us, into abusing children.
we get abused in schools, in the home, we as children are abused in the legal system.
the second class citizen status of children (adult supremacy) works hand in hand with the patriarchy, and serves to further alienate ourselves from our bodies, our families, our communities.
i would hope that if a friend found me abusing my own children, they would have the grace and generosity to get down to my level, and attempt to help me walk to a place of peace and equality with my own children, rather than shun me for my ignorance and shortcomings.
@niclas @AmpBenzScientist