@freemo it's definitely easier said than done, but it sounds like you may need to take a step back from all of this

It's really apparent that it's causing you a ton of stress, and it's definitely easy to get caught up in all the negative aspects.

I hope you can keep in mind that there is a ton of really great aspects to qoto; namely the sheer number of really cool and intelligent people that are here. Honestly it feels amazing to have a community that breaks down some of the social stigma of talking to people with a higher social prestige, without having it yourself.

Trying to run the server is a lot of work, and it's clear you've put your heart into it; you wouldn't care this much about ensuring qoto is accessible and open to everyone who wants to join (within reason of course). I don't need to tell you that, but I feel it needs to be said just to put it in writing.

There arent pure good and bad people in the world, only people who strive to do what they think is good and those who are apathetic. As painful as it may feel, there is a point of diminishing returns for trying to convince some people. Doesn't mean you shouldn't try, just may need to switch up how you approach it.

In the end, I appreciate what you've done and continue to do and hope these issues can be resolved in a way that allows you to have some peace.