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Apparently capitalism is even more late stage than we'd been led to believe.

RT @DeathStarPR
Be like Darth Vader:
-Wears a helmet
-Wears full body life-supporting heavy armor
-Still practices social distancing by sleeping in a private meditation chamber
-Uses the Force to choke co-workers from a safe distance

RT @orcoastaquarium
Even though the aquarium is closed right now, our animal care team is still working hard – even on SCUBA. Today, one of our bat rays gave birth and the staff were able to transfer two new babies to a nursery pool. The mother and babies are doing well.

RT @moriahmaney@twitter.activitypub.actor
"all women wfh are on the couch with a macbook air" 🤔

RT @kassman_ben@twitter.activitypub.actor
Oh, you’re into electronic music? Name 5 sorting algorithm compilation videos.

RT @mikeselinker@twitter.activitypub.actor
@LaserMWebber@twitter.com @CBE@twitter.com Ooh, are we doing Tom Swifties now? OKAY:

I am stuck doing nothing in my house, Mike said homeostatically.

RT @natcassidy@twitter.activitypub.actor
DEMOCRATS: We need to actually do our job and help people.

REPUBLICANS: Okay, here's a bill where poor people all get to share one single hot dog and rich people each get to print as much money as they want.

DEMOCRATS: No

MEDIA: Bill Fails to Pass Due to Partisan Squabbling

RT @KyloR3n@twitter.activitypub.actor
dear diary
spent my day sitting around in my private chamber again in case anyone wanted to skype

RT @AugieNash@twitter.activitypub.actor
I'm at Sam's Club

Older couple in 70's checking out

Cashier asks if they found everything they needed

Lady said no - needed bread

Young man in 20's heard this and says " Ma'am, I have a loaf you can have, and if you see anything in my cart, you're welcome to it"

RT @scalzi
People freaking out about a week of at-home quarantine is why generation ships to the stars aren't the slam dunk some people think they are.

RT @annielizzz@twitter.activitypub.actor
my mom has really enjoyed being quarantined with me since classes went online

Just spent two hours unsuccessfully trying to set up video chat (and hence screen sharing) with a relative.

We used to believe that only elite superspies could enter secret passwords in the face of sensory overload. Now we expect elderly disabled people to do it.

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